For my weekly writing spot on this site, see the One-Minute Mystic, with a new meditation posted every Monday. Also see The Village, the story of Misty Longings, England's most beautiful village, posted episode by episode earlier this year.       In five minutes, Playboy Prince the Pointless becomes Plucky Prince the Perfect. No axe required. The battle of Naseby in 1645 sealed the king's defeat in England's Civil War; but it did not herald a republic. The king was allowed his foolishness – let's put it down to experience – and with one or two safeguards proposed, encouraged back onto the throne. As we now know, he never made it. But Charles was beheaded not because England didn't want a king – but because while negotiating with Parliament, he was also negotiating with every foreign army possible. Oh, and he was curiously inept in human contact. As even his great ally Archbishop Laud said: "A mild and gracious prince who knew not how, nor how to be made, great." But after the Republican experiment of the 1650s, monarchy returned with a vengeance – literally: the body of the usurper Cromwell was dug up, dragged through the London streets to Tyburn, and hanged on a gibbet for a day, before being decapitated. Welcome home, your majesty. The thing is, however low the monarchy sinks – and its lows are well documented – its resurrection needs only a moment. And "When Harry met Tali", was certainly one of those. Price Harry "The Bullet Magnet" returns from taking on the Taliban in great form. He says: "It's best being shot at – because it makes the day go quicker." He talks of a night bivouac under the stars, and rubbish food. Yes, he's a royal who eats standard ration pack grub like everyone else. "It's not great, no. I had fresh goat with the Ghurkhas, but since then, nothing fresh." So did he enjoy it? "It was probably one of the happiest times of my life. I enjoyed it more than I should – out there in the middle of nature, under the stars. Two days before I left, I even heard a bird sing in the desert! And although I hate to say it, I have to say 'thank you' to the British media for keeping the pact." He's clearly angry with the army high-ups, however, who try to protect him. Harry is an action prince – he doesn't want to be molly-coddled. And what now? "I'm disappointed to be back. Once you're back from operations, everything's an anti-climax. It's why people join up – the adrenalin. But I'm looking forward to having a bath; you can't be upset about being at home. I'm currently waiting to hear from my Colonel, to see what he's offering me." The only two people to receive letters from him while away were Prince Charles and Prince William, who would inform the Queen of any "nice bits". And the first words of Prince William when they were reunited? "'Hello, how are you, there's the food.' Wang!" "He was just one of the troop leaders," said Corporal O'Reilly. "A good lad; no airs about him." And that's the secret. We only execute kings with airs. More writings © Simon Parke