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April 27, 2010
The most beautiful thing
As you may or may not know, I may have a hernia. And then again, I may not. Some days I think i have, and other days, the idea is just too ridiculous.
The trouble is, when someone says you may have a hernia, you might as well have, whether you have one or not, because from that point on, everything then feels like a hernia. Sore finger? Hernia! Slight ear ache? Definitely hernia! Irritated by a shop keeper? Get down to A and E, NOW!
'Listen to your body' they say, which is good - but only if you speak
the same language. And like a politician, my body's not terribly good at answering specific questions. Hurts when I cough/doesn't hurt when i cough - well make your mind up!
A friend has kindly fixed me up to see a doctor about it. After some hesitation, I have made an appointment, but don't really want to go in case I'm wasting the doctor's time. Another friend pulled me up about this: he says I have to go, whether I want to or not, otherwise the other friend will be upset that he's tried to help me and I haven't taken him up on his offer. 'What, you didn't go? And after all that trouble I went to?'
You can see that this is a social minefield, and that it's all getting really complicated. The possibilities for offence multiply exponentially by the day. Two more days of this, and I'll have no friends at all.
I forget now where this all started - oh that's right, the possibility of a hernia.
A little knowledge is a dangerous thing, and that's a fact. In the meantime, I'm just another poor sucker out there looking for that most beautiful thing: a correct diagnosis.
Posted by Mr Bojangles at April 27, 2010 04:39 PM